We gathered. We sang. We worshipped. We passed motions to dissolve. We passed motions to merge. It has all been in process for the past six years. This conference has been in existence for the past 24 years, when two other conferences merged. (North and Central). The North Central Conference is now merging with three others to create one large conference. It is all part of being a mainline denomination, and specifically, one in decline.
I'm not entirely sure exactly how I feel. Today, to tell the truth, I didn't feel too much. Yesterday, I felt a greater sense of connection and belonging and affection at the clergy session than I have felt in a while. [Being retired does have an affect on one's feelings of connectedness.] Certainly I do feel some sense of loss. A part of my identity, the 'group' to which I have always belonged, becomes something new, something else, something bigger, something different. When the new conference meets next year, if I go, most of the faces will be unfamiliar. It will be in an unfamiliar city, etc.
Today, we also dissolved the district of which I have been a part. Come to think of it the first district to which I was attached was also dissolved some years ago. A colleague to whom I mentioned this said jokingly: "You are the kiss of death to districts!"
We closed with a whisper, more than a bang. And perhaps that is as it should be.
Slowly, us retired clergy will all just fade away. However, I don't think I am yet in the fading mode. Or maybe I am and don't even know it!
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