Happiness Came Later

At a wedding these days, it is the custom to have photographs of both sets of parents from their weddings, along with a photo of the bride and groom.  Yesterday when my oldest daughter Brenda was visiting, I pointed out the 8 by 10 wedding photo I had enlarged for that purpose, now in the cabinet.  She looked at it, and commented:

"You know I don't have any memories of you when you were that young. [29 years ago]  My friend Neenie [who has three children] has this great sadness that her children will never know her from when she was young, and will only remember her when she is older."


Somehow, I don't have that same reaction of sadness at all. Maybe I am even glad that my children won't, don't remember me from my younger years. I didn't have it together then. I was pretty much raw material, yet to be really formed into the adult I would become.   I faltered and failed a lot. I wasn't sure who I was or was supposed to be. Many trials, lots of errors.

So I suppose the truth is, my life as a younger person was turbulent, filled with pain and uncertainty.  Even I  don't especially want to remember me back then!!   I like myself so much better now.  I am proud of what I have accomplished and who I have become.

I suppose there are some people who remember happy times and have fond memories of their twenties, and early thirties.  My great happiness has come later in life.  And I am glad that it has all come in this order!